Hi.
Hope you are well.
Knew exactly what I wanted to write to you about. Great stuff. All organized and partly pithy.
That was somewhere around 5 AM. It's a little after 2 PM now. Should'a stopped to blog then because I haven't a clue what it was I wanted to share.
All that's clear is the title.
***
Two Months Later
Been out of work for two months.
Thankful to God for unemployment checks and for His extra provision. Nice of Him.
But to be honest with you, I'm not doing all that well with God. Not that I don't believe or hope or ... well, you know. Just that much of the "bring it" bravado is gone.
And I have a GOOD life, not a crummy one like zillions of others.
It's like the difference between a weekend camping trip in nice weather and spending the summer in Alaska. One is fun, one is commitment.
One's gonna be over fast. One's gonna last a long time.
But they're both going to end.
Don't know when/if this season will end.
Hard times last.
Weak people don't.
With the understanding that God can do anything whenever He wants -- without warning, hints or apparent logic -- I do not see any end to my joblessness.
Have I exhausted every possibility? Nope.
Most possibilities, but I haven't applied at [insert someplace lower than Walmart here].
Yet.
***
Almost laughed last week when the moron on the radio reported moronically [You're right. In two mere months, I'm not as nice as I used to be.] how the weekly "first-time" claims for unemployment were slightly higher than expected.
The figure? I think it was 417,000.
Real people.
Really out of work for the first time.
Families really screwed.
[Click here for link.]
Googled the population of Omaha. 414,000.
[Click here for link.]
A week or two earlier the first-time unemployment stat was all the way down to twice the population of Rochester, NY.
Every week the same number of people as in prominent US cities lose their jobs. Only the ones who apply for unemployment are counted.
People with degrees, experience, grey suits and/or red dresses, shoes with tassels and/or designer labels -- people with school loans, kids who play sports, car loans, needy family members, medical bills and nutso amounts of money on credit cards -- lose their jobs, incomes, benefits, prestige, business lives, perks and too often: purpose.
Do you really think we're all gonna get new jobs?
Decent jobs with decent pay?
Benefits?
Sorry. There's a difference between faith and insanity.
***
Not sure when I abandoned my quest for meekness and humility.
Cut me off in traffic and I'll flip you off faster than the speed of screaming.
Mock poor people or "people of Walmart" and I'll nail your judgmental hubris in an instant. I'll do all I can to drive the truth into you that you are only weeks away from ruin. Laugh. Believe in whatever you like.
Seriously? Do you believe your life could not be ruined? Today?
Not beyond God's ability to reconstruct -- just different than it is today. But beyond recognition.
I don't care who you are.
"Doctor! There must be some mistake! I can't have [insert disease here]."
"What do you mean you met someone on the Internet? We have children!"
"You've been arrested? For WHAT?"
"An ACCIDENT? Are they OK?"
"Not gonna pay? But we had insurance for this kinda thing!"
"They can't just make you reenlist? You have a family! Can they?"
"But if you don't pay what you owe me ... I'll go bankrupt!"
"You can't fire me! I've been here for [insert years here]."
"Someone told me they saw you ...."
Anybody still reading this?
Helloooooo????
I know. You think this couldn't happen to you, right?
Trouble ain't comin to your door.
These are only the ramblings of a discouraged loser.
Good for you, Sparky.
Hold on to that thought.
And don't ever read another newspaper about what's happening in Africa or Asia or South America or our own United States.
Obliterate the impressions of millions of people with no electricity after this weekend's hurricane. It's all that liberal media garbage that you don't have to listen to.
Iraq. Iran. Chad. Haiti. Israel. Uganda.
If you're like me, you cannot even name all the countries where war is raging today.
Can you? No.
Because we don't care.
We have our own problems.
Right?
***
Yup.
In two short months, I've changed.
Sorry.
***
I used to love starting conversations by asking, "What would you do with a million dollars?" Began many delightful chats that way. Learned about people's hopes and aspirations. Dreams and desires ... good and reckless.
Now I want to ask everyone: "How would you cope with disaster?"
***
Got my first new car when I was 21. A Gremlin. Loved it. Light blue. Roof rack. Zippy little sucker. Cost me $2,000, brand-new.
Bought a new VW Rabbit Champagne Edition in the 70s. Loved it.
Bought a new VW Fox wagon in the 80s. Loved it.
Might have been another new car. Bunches of nice used ones.
Five convertibles. Five motorcycles.
I forget how many cars.
***
I do remember that one of those new cars was snagged by the law courtesy of my newly "born again" wife in our [first] divorce.
That was the winter of 1976-77. I was a new Christian myself. Began reading the Bible. Began going to church. Stopped smoking pot before/at/after work; haven't smoked since.
We lived in a small town 30 miles from where I worked the afternoon shift on an AM/FM radio station. I hitchhiked to/from that job six days a week in the worst winter you can imagine. (Google it.)
I walked a mile to the on-ramp of the interstate to stick out my thumb. Walked a mile from the off-ramp to my job. It was dark by the time I left work. Cold. Windy. Snowy.
Hitchhiked in frigid mornings and after dark. Thirty miles each way. Through an empty countryside. Sixty miles a day. Six days a week. For at least six weeks. Do the math.
I remember bursting into tears on the way home in some stranger's car when a little girl began singing, "Jesus Loves Me."
So windy on some days going to work (facing west as I hitchhiked) that I didn't have to hold the sign (dayglow green, reversible, with the name of the town where I was going) because the wind pinned it to my chest.
Tough days.
My party pals thought I'd gone nuts and that God was my imaginary friend.
The Christians I met didn't know WHAT to do with me.
Amicable split with my heathen friends at work when I lost my job.
The Program Director hugged me and told me he loved me.
And he did. And I loved him.
Googled him a while back. Big shot on the radio in Baltimore.
Deserved it.
Acrimonious split with my christian wife.
Go figure.
No, I'm not whining.
That was the deal.
And I survived.
Knew it was temporary.
Knew I had many more years to recover.
Knew God would care for me.
My best years were ahead. Seriously.
Not that I knew it. But they were.
Kids. Ministry. Grandchildren.
The Bike. Maybe even you.
Divorces. Penury. A child who not only didn't want me at her christian baptism, but was angry that I even found out about it.
Tough stuff.
Not too tough to endure.
And/or thrive.
So far.
But it's getting old.
Even though it isn't.
And I'm not doing as well as I should.
Even though I should.
***
Now do you see why I am thankful for a car with 327,592 miles on it?
It's mine. Nobody's gonna have a nice cop interrupt my newscast with a warrant for its arrest.
Yes, it is embarrassing to drive a car with the back window duct-taped shut. Not exactly the Babemobile.
But any woman who won't like me because of my car is not a woman I would want to have a future with anyway. Saves time, in the long run. Seriously.
What man can't get a date in a [insert car a hottie would like here]?
I don't want a woman who wants to date my car. Or bike. Or clothes.
***
And while we're on this honesty kick, let's get this straight.
I overcompensate about my absence of a love life by teasing about dating movie stars, etc.
The best date I've had in years? Yesterday.
Went to church with a lovely lady I met on Facebook. Went to lunch with her afterward. Jim, her husband, paid for my meal. He's a great guy with a great wife.
That's all the dating I want/need right now, thanks.
As I've said before, the last woman I kissed was my last wife. Seven years ago.
That's the deal.
Is it getting old?
Yup.
Can I endure?
Yup.
Would I rather be happily married to a caring, dedicated woman?
Show me some people who are happily married.
Then ask me.
***
Self-Loathing
Having the hardest time with me.
Do NOT like the way I freaked out at/over AT&T when it took more than six hours to activate a cell phone recently. Finally drove 25 miles RT to the store.
The solution? I had inserted the SIM card improperly. My mistake. Thought it would only go in ONE way. Nope. Nothing is foolproof to some fools.
I'll bet I swore 100 times that day.
Lost my temper. Lost my cool. Lost my self-control.
Lost my self-respect.
***
Some people will think I'm always that way.
Some people will think I could never be that way.
Some people will think they've been that way.
Some people will think they could not be that way.
Stay tuned.
***
What would it take to freak you out?
How would you handle it?
What'cha gonna do when the well runs dry? Or the levee breaks?
I don't care what you'd do with a million dollars.
How are you gonna cope with hardship?
Who will you be without your fancy car/house/clothes/whatever?
Don't think for a minute that God loves you so much you won't have hard times. Read the Bible. It's about the God who cares for you IN trials, not a bodyguard who keeps you from trouble.
That's the deal, folks.
God might have no plans to keep trouble from your door.
I don't know. Neither do you.
God has plans for you to trust Him in the valley of the shadow of debt and death. To know for certain that He will never leave you nor forsake you.
Even when all else is lost.
Ready?
***
Be thankful for the good days.
Be thankful in the hard days.
This life isn't the one that lasts forever.
The next one does.
That's the one where everything is perfect.
Not this one.
That's the kingdom where God reigns.
Not this one.
Because of heaven (and not the lure of seven virgins waiting for my arrival) I can and will endure this world. By God's grace, strength and encouragement.
God loves me.
God cares for me and my loved ones.
Life is good, even if life isn't perfect.
I have hope that God will weave everything together and make something beautiful of my life and existence.
I have hope that God will comfort me
even on days when I'm raging at AT&T
in spite of my sin
because no one can be good enough to earn God's love
and God will offer me whatever it takes to endure.
Even if the path does not include cars, jobs, love or adoring family.
Even if it's just the two of us.
I'll make it.
Even if I want to give up.
Even if I want to vomit when rich people complain about being poor.
Or my feelings are hurt when poor people -- like me -- are dissed.
You can make it too.
Maybe easier than me; you probably have less baggage to carry.
And you're probably nicer.
Say it with me:
"We can make it."
It's true.
Even when it doesn't seem true.
***
If only we'd listen to God when He says
"Do not be afraid."
Monday, August 29, 2011
Sunday, August 21, 2011
Expectations
Hi.
Hope you are well.
Sorry I haven't written more, but ... to tell you the truth ... I haven't been doing all that well and I refuse to whine about it.
Well, I sort of refuse.
**
Update
First, I want to thank God that I am getting unemployment benefits (UB) from my last employer. Never expected to get them.
When they fired my boss a few months back, he applied for UB. They fought to keep him from getting UB. A hearing was scheduled to decide the case. My old boss gave me a [take a stab at spelling "subpoena" here] to testify at the hearing -- although I didn't have a clue what I was going to be asked or what anybody expected me to know or say.
The Company (TC) we worked for hired an attorney to represent *me* at that hearing. Seriously. Had this attorney's cell number and home number and when I called he answered on the first ring. Told the attorney that TC made me buy my own pens for work and asked why they would hire a lawyer to defend ME at the UB hearing for somebody else. Got a "because they love you" b/s response.
Figured out later it was cheaper for TC to hire attorneys to fight UB claims than to pay UB to workers unjustly fired.
Figured when it was my turn to get a UB hearing they'd fight just as hard against me. Figured only God could defeat them. [Please note: I did not call them "merciless dogs."]
Expected a battle. Expected to argue my case. Expected God to intercede. Didn't expect to ever be granted UB.
TC never opposed my benefits. No hearing. No lawyers. No battle.
Only the foolish would miss God's hand at work. Call it faith or idiocy, I know God delivered me -- again -- from the hands of a mighty foe.
I am thankful.
**
These Days
Still find being out of work and out of touch with people exceptionally hard. I try to balance looking for work with getting out of the house.
Pondered that popular platitude "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result."
Figured it's insane to continue to look for work over and over, expecting to get a job. Do it anyway, but I call it perseverance.
Figured it's insane to be on the lookout (as compared to "prowl") for a woman to have, hold and enjoy. Do it anyway, but I call it being a romantic.
But we all know it's insanity.
Take finding a job, for instance. There are precisely a gazillionty-seven bazillion, 843 zillion, 444 teramillion, 25 million, 12 thousand and nine people out of work.
People who are fortunate enough to be on UB have received them, on average, for 40 weeks. It's quite common for companies to reject all job applications from people who have been unemployed for more than six months.
(People who have been out of work for over a year -- unless they're still getting UB -- are not counted by the government as unemployed.)
Want a flash mob? Advertise a job in the paper or online and tell applicants to show up someplace for an interview. You could have 5,000 people anywhere you want, whenever you want.
That's the job market.
Bet I know 50 attractive single women. Bet each one knows dozens of less attractive single guys. Bet we all know two dozen people in bad marriages. Bet most of us don't know a dozen people who have been in love with the same person for more than a year.
That's the love market.
Relationships are crazy. But for the most part, we all say we're willing to work for a good one. Even though it's as crazy as hoping we'll get good jobs someday.
**
A Lesson From The Bike
Motorcycles are operated by individuals who can do it all themselves without asking for any assistance.
You want the engine to start? Start it yourself.
Want to turn left? Turn left.
Wanna stop? Stop.
But you're on your own, bucko.
Looking cool won't start your engine or help you turn or stop. It's up to you and nobody else. Leather and chrome don't do much at 75 mph.
**
Went to lunch with a friend. He had surgery and his arm was in a sling. He asked if I minded cutting up the steak he ordered because his arm was skronked. I was happy to help.
There ain't nothin like that on a bike.
You are on your own.
You cannot expect any help from anyone while you're riding.
And I love it.
But what you gain by being independent
you lose by not being interdependent.
Not dependent, mind you.
Just that riding a bike isn't a team sport. At least not the way that I ride.
And my way does more to isolate me from others
than connect me to/with others.
That's an area where I need to grow and mature.
**
Lessons from a Raffle
Rode with many others on a charity ride sponsored by the Hall County Sheriff's department. Nice people. Nice day. Nice ride.
LOVE having a police escort that lets you blast through red lights and stop signs, riding in a pack with other bikes.
The fluidity of zipping and wiggling with others gets a tad primordial. Kinda like being a duck flying in harmony and unison with others, following eons-old urges to vee our way to safety, food and a chance to hit on the lady duck you've flown behind all day.
After an hour or so of riding your motorcycle with the pack, you get an urge to flap your wings and quack.
But you don't.
Because that would be crazy
and you'd crash your bike
and die a horrible death.
It's not good to follow all your urges; especially in Las Vegas or with women named "Boom-Boom" or guys they call "Rodent."
But I digress.
After the ride, there was a raffle.
I won the world's ugliest T-shirt. Wouldn't dare use it to shine The Bike because I don't want to know how it would get even with me for rubbing something so ugly on it. I mean, what if the ugly wore off? Huh?
Also won a set of tools. Drill bits, they said. A few appeared to be what violent ninjas throw a mile or so to silently maim/murder their helpless prey. Not being a ninja (anymore), I gave them away.
The raffle became increasingly frustrating. People kept winning free oil changes. Bunches of them.
I cleverly reminded God that HIS car -- on loan to me -- needed an oil change and that WE didn't exactly have a bunch of money to waste on oil changes (given opportunities to spend $25 on motorcycle charity rides and valuable raffle tickets).
Gave God a snippy "That's OK!" each time guys with plenty of money won free oil changes and I didn't. But it bothered me.
God can do anything, right?
God loves me, right?
I want/need an oil change and here's a perfect way for God to give me one for FREE. All He has to do is have them pick MY number. What's so hard about that?
Nope, I didn't win an oil change.
Therefore I was not going to get a free oil change.
Because ... you cannot expect it to work any other way at a raffle.
When the party was over, I walked back through the crowd toward my bike. I had only seen four or five people that I knew. Didn't take long to say goodbye.
Almost bumped into a stranger. His face was all scrunched up -- confused looking -- but like he was sucking on a lemon at the same time. This total stranger looks RIGHT at me and he says right TO me: "Do you live in South Hall [county]?"
Told him I did.
He mumbled something about living WAY too far from there to be able to use "this" and he handed me a business card from the place down the road from me. It was an authorization for a free oil change.
God didn't need me to win a raffle.
God wasn't intimidated by my frustration that He didn't do things my way.
He waited until I gave up all hope. Don't ask me why.
Then He dropped an oil change into my hand.
Because He loves me.
And because He can do anything.
Even when you least expect it.
***
Expectations
I could talk for an hour about expectations.
(But, if you know me, you know I could talk for an hour about anything. And I will, if you don't suddenly remember that you'd love to listen but your grandmother just died. Again.)
What you expect determines your mental and physical health, your spiritual health and your financial health too, in my humble opinion.
Expectations are the bull's-eyes on the targets we set for our lives.
Expect a perfect spouse and you're doomed.
Expect perfect kids/parents and you're doomed.
Expect perfect coworkers/neighbors/siblings/friends and you're doomed.
Expect all your investments to prosper and you're doomed.
Set reasonable expectations and you will rarely be disappointed.
Always expect the worst and you will never be disappointed ... or content.
**
My Expectations
I don't expect you to like my expectations.
I'm not the happiest guy on earth and I have had my share of heartaches. I think I'm a realist. With that in mind, here are a few things I expect. I'll follow them with a few hopes and desires.
I expect I will not always have great health.
I do not expect to always have an abundance of money.
I do not expect my car and household appliances to last forever.
I expect that I will get speeding tickets if I drive/ride too fast.
I expect to die someday.
I expect that everyone I know will die someday.
I expect to be sad when friends die, even if it's inevitable.
I expect a few people will be sad when I die.
I expect I will be mugged/robbed or worse if I am in the wrong place at the wrong time.
I expect wisdom to protect me from foolish mistakes. For example, I expect I will lose my money if I make foolish investments.
I expect my friends and family to be imperfect.
I expect my enemies will be merciless and malevolent.
I expect God will forgive my sins and care for me in good times and bad.
I do not expect to ever have another great job, as I have had in the past.
I do not expect to be loved by a faithful, gracious woman.
I do not expect to be happily married to a godly woman.
I do not expect all my friends to be faithful to me or one another.
I do not expect my daughters to love me or care for me when I'm old.
I do not expect anyone to meet my needs.
I expect God will meet my needs; maybe through you, my kids, my family or others, but my reliance will be on God, not others.
I expect to fail God.
I expect Him to forgive me.
I expect to fail the people in my life.
I do not expect them to forgive me.
I expect to spend eternity in heaven with God.
I do not expect to be worthy of heaven.
**
My Hopes
I hope to use my gifts and talents in a job that will pay my bills.
I hope to have friends to love and enjoy.
I hope to find a woman to share my life with and to share hers with me.
I hope to have good health, but I know I must eat better and exercise more.
I hope to have good relationships with my daughters and their families.
I hope my car won't break down, but I know I must maintain it wisely.
I hope my friends will be honest with me.
I hope I will always be honest with my friends.
I hope I can stay in my home for many years.
I hope I can earn enough money to do so.
I don't have to hope God will provide for me wherever I end up, because I know He will.
I hope my friends and family will have long, healthy lives.
I hope to "be there" for my friends in times of need.
I hope to have friends who will help me ... if I can ever bring myself to ask for help. I also hope to never have to ask for help from anyone.
**
I hope you will find the peace that comes from having faith in God.
I hope you will ask Him to forgive your sins.
I hope you will believe Jesus Christ died to pay the penalty for your sins.
I hope you will find joy in serving others.
I hope you have friends and family who enjoy serving you.
I hope you are satisfied with your life ... not angry or resentful that some expectations were unmet.
I hope we can temper our expectations.
I hope we can have enormous dreams.
I hope we will forgive God for not meeting all our expectations.
I hope we will learn to be thankful for what we have.
I hope God will use us to love and care for others, on His behalf.
I hope your life is as good as mine -- or better -- and that you'll tell others how great God has been to you and your loved ones.
Hope you are well.
Sorry I haven't written more, but ... to tell you the truth ... I haven't been doing all that well and I refuse to whine about it.
Well, I sort of refuse.
**
Update
First, I want to thank God that I am getting unemployment benefits (UB) from my last employer. Never expected to get them.
When they fired my boss a few months back, he applied for UB. They fought to keep him from getting UB. A hearing was scheduled to decide the case. My old boss gave me a [take a stab at spelling "subpoena" here] to testify at the hearing -- although I didn't have a clue what I was going to be asked or what anybody expected me to know or say.
The Company (TC) we worked for hired an attorney to represent *me* at that hearing. Seriously. Had this attorney's cell number and home number and when I called he answered on the first ring. Told the attorney that TC made me buy my own pens for work and asked why they would hire a lawyer to defend ME at the UB hearing for somebody else. Got a "because they love you" b/s response.
Figured out later it was cheaper for TC to hire attorneys to fight UB claims than to pay UB to workers unjustly fired.
Figured when it was my turn to get a UB hearing they'd fight just as hard against me. Figured only God could defeat them. [Please note: I did not call them "merciless dogs."]
Expected a battle. Expected to argue my case. Expected God to intercede. Didn't expect to ever be granted UB.
TC never opposed my benefits. No hearing. No lawyers. No battle.
Only the foolish would miss God's hand at work. Call it faith or idiocy, I know God delivered me -- again -- from the hands of a mighty foe.
I am thankful.
**
These Days
Still find being out of work and out of touch with people exceptionally hard. I try to balance looking for work with getting out of the house.
Pondered that popular platitude "Insanity is doing the same thing over and over, expecting a different result."
Figured it's insane to continue to look for work over and over, expecting to get a job. Do it anyway, but I call it perseverance.
Figured it's insane to be on the lookout (as compared to "prowl") for a woman to have, hold and enjoy. Do it anyway, but I call it being a romantic.
But we all know it's insanity.
Take finding a job, for instance. There are precisely a gazillionty-seven bazillion, 843 zillion, 444 teramillion, 25 million, 12 thousand and nine people out of work.
People who are fortunate enough to be on UB have received them, on average, for 40 weeks. It's quite common for companies to reject all job applications from people who have been unemployed for more than six months.
(People who have been out of work for over a year -- unless they're still getting UB -- are not counted by the government as unemployed.)
Want a flash mob? Advertise a job in the paper or online and tell applicants to show up someplace for an interview. You could have 5,000 people anywhere you want, whenever you want.
That's the job market.
Bet I know 50 attractive single women. Bet each one knows dozens of less attractive single guys. Bet we all know two dozen people in bad marriages. Bet most of us don't know a dozen people who have been in love with the same person for more than a year.
That's the love market.
Relationships are crazy. But for the most part, we all say we're willing to work for a good one. Even though it's as crazy as hoping we'll get good jobs someday.
**
A Lesson From The Bike
You want the engine to start? Start it yourself.
Want to turn left? Turn left.
Wanna stop? Stop.
But you're on your own, bucko.
Looking cool won't start your engine or help you turn or stop. It's up to you and nobody else. Leather and chrome don't do much at 75 mph.
**
Went to lunch with a friend. He had surgery and his arm was in a sling. He asked if I minded cutting up the steak he ordered because his arm was skronked. I was happy to help.
There ain't nothin like that on a bike.
You are on your own.
You cannot expect any help from anyone while you're riding.
And I love it.
But what you gain by being independent
you lose by not being interdependent.
Not dependent, mind you.
Just that riding a bike isn't a team sport. At least not the way that I ride.
And my way does more to isolate me from others
than connect me to/with others.
That's an area where I need to grow and mature.
**
Lessons from a Raffle
Rode with many others on a charity ride sponsored by the Hall County Sheriff's department. Nice people. Nice day. Nice ride.
LOVE having a police escort that lets you blast through red lights and stop signs, riding in a pack with other bikes.
The fluidity of zipping and wiggling with others gets a tad primordial. Kinda like being a duck flying in harmony and unison with others, following eons-old urges to vee our way to safety, food and a chance to hit on the lady duck you've flown behind all day.
After an hour or so of riding your motorcycle with the pack, you get an urge to flap your wings and quack.
But you don't.
Because that would be crazy
and you'd crash your bike
and die a horrible death.
It's not good to follow all your urges; especially in Las Vegas or with women named "Boom-Boom" or guys they call "Rodent."
But I digress.
After the ride, there was a raffle.
I won the world's ugliest T-shirt. Wouldn't dare use it to shine The Bike because I don't want to know how it would get even with me for rubbing something so ugly on it. I mean, what if the ugly wore off? Huh?
Also won a set of tools. Drill bits, they said. A few appeared to be what violent ninjas throw a mile or so to silently maim/murder their helpless prey. Not being a ninja (anymore), I gave them away.
The raffle became increasingly frustrating. People kept winning free oil changes. Bunches of them.
I cleverly reminded God that HIS car -- on loan to me -- needed an oil change and that WE didn't exactly have a bunch of money to waste on oil changes (given opportunities to spend $25 on motorcycle charity rides and valuable raffle tickets).
Gave God a snippy "That's OK!" each time guys with plenty of money won free oil changes and I didn't. But it bothered me.
God can do anything, right?
God loves me, right?
I want/need an oil change and here's a perfect way for God to give me one for FREE. All He has to do is have them pick MY number. What's so hard about that?
Nope, I didn't win an oil change.
Therefore I was not going to get a free oil change.
Because ... you cannot expect it to work any other way at a raffle.
When the party was over, I walked back through the crowd toward my bike. I had only seen four or five people that I knew. Didn't take long to say goodbye.
Almost bumped into a stranger. His face was all scrunched up -- confused looking -- but like he was sucking on a lemon at the same time. This total stranger looks RIGHT at me and he says right TO me: "Do you live in South Hall [county]?"
Told him I did.
He mumbled something about living WAY too far from there to be able to use "this" and he handed me a business card from the place down the road from me. It was an authorization for a free oil change.
God didn't need me to win a raffle.
God wasn't intimidated by my frustration that He didn't do things my way.
He waited until I gave up all hope. Don't ask me why.
Then He dropped an oil change into my hand.
Because He loves me.
And because He can do anything.
Even when you least expect it.
***
Expectations
I could talk for an hour about expectations.
(But, if you know me, you know I could talk for an hour about anything. And I will, if you don't suddenly remember that you'd love to listen but your grandmother just died. Again.)
What you expect determines your mental and physical health, your spiritual health and your financial health too, in my humble opinion.
Expectations are the bull's-eyes on the targets we set for our lives.
Expect a perfect spouse and you're doomed.
Expect perfect kids/parents and you're doomed.
Expect perfect coworkers/neighbors/siblings/friends and you're doomed.
Expect all your investments to prosper and you're doomed.
Set reasonable expectations and you will rarely be disappointed.
Always expect the worst and you will never be disappointed ... or content.
**
My Expectations
I don't expect you to like my expectations.
I'm not the happiest guy on earth and I have had my share of heartaches. I think I'm a realist. With that in mind, here are a few things I expect. I'll follow them with a few hopes and desires.
I expect I will not always have great health.
I do not expect to always have an abundance of money.
I do not expect my car and household appliances to last forever.
I expect that I will get speeding tickets if I drive/ride too fast.
I expect to die someday.
I expect that everyone I know will die someday.
I expect to be sad when friends die, even if it's inevitable.
I expect a few people will be sad when I die.
I expect I will be mugged/robbed or worse if I am in the wrong place at the wrong time.
I expect wisdom to protect me from foolish mistakes. For example, I expect I will lose my money if I make foolish investments.
I expect my friends and family to be imperfect.
I expect my enemies will be merciless and malevolent.
I expect God will forgive my sins and care for me in good times and bad.
I do not expect to ever have another great job, as I have had in the past.
I do not expect to be loved by a faithful, gracious woman.
I do not expect to be happily married to a godly woman.
I do not expect all my friends to be faithful to me or one another.
I do not expect my daughters to love me or care for me when I'm old.
I do not expect anyone to meet my needs.
I expect God will meet my needs; maybe through you, my kids, my family or others, but my reliance will be on God, not others.
I expect to fail God.
I expect Him to forgive me.
I expect to fail the people in my life.
I do not expect them to forgive me.
I expect to spend eternity in heaven with God.
I do not expect to be worthy of heaven.
**
My Hopes
I hope to use my gifts and talents in a job that will pay my bills.
I hope to have friends to love and enjoy.
I hope to find a woman to share my life with and to share hers with me.
I hope to have good health, but I know I must eat better and exercise more.
I hope to have good relationships with my daughters and their families.
I hope my car won't break down, but I know I must maintain it wisely.
I hope my friends will be honest with me.
I hope I will always be honest with my friends.
I hope I can stay in my home for many years.
I hope I can earn enough money to do so.
I don't have to hope God will provide for me wherever I end up, because I know He will.
I hope my friends and family will have long, healthy lives.
I hope to "be there" for my friends in times of need.
I hope to have friends who will help me ... if I can ever bring myself to ask for help. I also hope to never have to ask for help from anyone.
**
I hope you will find the peace that comes from having faith in God.
I hope you will ask Him to forgive your sins.
I hope you will believe Jesus Christ died to pay the penalty for your sins.
I hope you will find joy in serving others.
I hope you have friends and family who enjoy serving you.
I hope you are satisfied with your life ... not angry or resentful that some expectations were unmet.
I hope we can temper our expectations.
I hope we can have enormous dreams.
I hope we will forgive God for not meeting all our expectations.
I hope we will learn to be thankful for what we have.
I hope God will use us to love and care for others, on His behalf.
I hope your life is as good as mine -- or better -- and that you'll tell others how great God has been to you and your loved ones.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
21 Reasons Why Stevie Wonder Should be President
Hi.
Struck me today that Stevie Wonder would be a far better president than Barack Obama, imho. Not being a racist, I decided to tease Obama without regard to the color of his skin. (Not doing so would be racism, from my perspective.)
So, I offer you 21 reasons why Stevie Wonder would be a better president than Barack Obama. (Or you.)
#1 - Stevie Wonder would never hug the Queen of England the first time they met. The Queen of England, however, would hug him.
#2 - Stevie Wonder would not waste as much time as Obama playing basketball.
#3 - Stevie Wonder would unite Democrats and Republicans. All he'd have to do is address a joint session of Congress and say, "Lemme hear you say, YEAAAAAHHH!" (Dems: "Yeah!") (Reps: "Yeah!") (Conservatives: "All righty now!") (Liberals: "Save the whales!")
#4 - If Stevie Wonder went on TV to address America, EVERYBODY would watch. Especially if he sang "Superstitious" to investors who were afraid of the stock market.
#5 - Stevie Wonder would give great speeches without relying on a Teleprompter.
#6 - It doesn't matter that Stevie Wonder is black. He'd be cool if he were green and had Martian feelers on his forehead. Even you are more cool than Obama.
#7 - Stevie Wonder knows what it's like to be in business. He knows what it costs to hire people. He knows what it's like to have a job and earn a living.
#8 - Stevie Wonder could get Martha and the Vandellas to get the wackos in London to dance in the streets, not riot.
#9 - Stevie Wonder could pay off the national debt by airing White House dinners and the entertainment afterward on pay-per-view television.
#10 - Stevie Wonder knows what it's like to overcome a handicap without blaming it on George W. Bush.
#11 - Stevie Wonder would appreciate my writing and care that I am out of work. He would hire me to write his speeches.
#12 - Stevie Wonder would give us a cool holiday for August: Take a Honky to the Hood Day. White folks could learn that actual human beings live there and that they're just as afraid of white people as the white people are of blacks. White people could try to teach blacks to drink green tea and eat turkey burgers. Blacks could try to teach whites to eat fried chicken and ribs and watermelon without getting it all over themselves.
#13 - Stevie Wonder would not let his mother-in-law live in the White House.
#14 - Stevie Wonder would not be afraid to let Hillary Clinton speak in public.
#15 - Stevie Wonder would be afraid to let Joe Biden speak in public.
#16 - Stevie Wonder would serve White House dinner guests fine bottled wine in individually wrapped small paper bags just to watch the expressions on their faces.
#17 - Stevie Wonder would put cool rims on the presidential limo.
#18 - Stevie Wonder would never abandon Israel, because he knows what it's like to be hated just because you are in the minority.
#19 - Stevie Wonder would make public transportation for the poor a higher priority than flying 200 people to Honolulu for his vacation.
#20 - Stevie Wonder would not be afraid of punks, like the creep who rules Iran, and he would not allow America to be bullied.
#21 - Everybody already loves and trusts Stevie Wonder. People PAY to see him. He doesn't have to read the polls to know what Americans want and need. If he ran America like a good concert, we'd all be happy, working and we'd be better dancers.
***
How many reasons could you add? Worthy suggestions will be posted below.
May God bless President Obama. And Stevie Wonder.
I wish Obama well. I only wish I could bid him "Farewell!"
:~)
Struck me today that Stevie Wonder would be a far better president than Barack Obama, imho. Not being a racist, I decided to tease Obama without regard to the color of his skin. (Not doing so would be racism, from my perspective.)
So, I offer you 21 reasons why Stevie Wonder would be a better president than Barack Obama. (Or you.)
#1 - Stevie Wonder would never hug the Queen of England the first time they met. The Queen of England, however, would hug him.
#2 - Stevie Wonder would not waste as much time as Obama playing basketball.
#3 - Stevie Wonder would unite Democrats and Republicans. All he'd have to do is address a joint session of Congress and say, "Lemme hear you say, YEAAAAAHHH!" (Dems: "Yeah!") (Reps: "Yeah!") (Conservatives: "All righty now!") (Liberals: "Save the whales!")
#4 - If Stevie Wonder went on TV to address America, EVERYBODY would watch. Especially if he sang "Superstitious" to investors who were afraid of the stock market.
#5 - Stevie Wonder would give great speeches without relying on a Teleprompter.
#6 - It doesn't matter that Stevie Wonder is black. He'd be cool if he were green and had Martian feelers on his forehead. Even you are more cool than Obama.
#7 - Stevie Wonder knows what it's like to be in business. He knows what it costs to hire people. He knows what it's like to have a job and earn a living.
#8 - Stevie Wonder could get Martha and the Vandellas to get the wackos in London to dance in the streets, not riot.
#9 - Stevie Wonder could pay off the national debt by airing White House dinners and the entertainment afterward on pay-per-view television.
#10 - Stevie Wonder knows what it's like to overcome a handicap without blaming it on George W. Bush.
#11 - Stevie Wonder would appreciate my writing and care that I am out of work. He would hire me to write his speeches.
#12 - Stevie Wonder would give us a cool holiday for August: Take a Honky to the Hood Day. White folks could learn that actual human beings live there and that they're just as afraid of white people as the white people are of blacks. White people could try to teach blacks to drink green tea and eat turkey burgers. Blacks could try to teach whites to eat fried chicken and ribs and watermelon without getting it all over themselves.
#13 - Stevie Wonder would not let his mother-in-law live in the White House.
#14 - Stevie Wonder would not be afraid to let Hillary Clinton speak in public.
#15 - Stevie Wonder would be afraid to let Joe Biden speak in public.
#16 - Stevie Wonder would serve White House dinner guests fine bottled wine in individually wrapped small paper bags just to watch the expressions on their faces.
#17 - Stevie Wonder would put cool rims on the presidential limo.
#18 - Stevie Wonder would never abandon Israel, because he knows what it's like to be hated just because you are in the minority.
#19 - Stevie Wonder would make public transportation for the poor a higher priority than flying 200 people to Honolulu for his vacation.
#20 - Stevie Wonder would not be afraid of punks, like the creep who rules Iran, and he would not allow America to be bullied.
#21 - Everybody already loves and trusts Stevie Wonder. People PAY to see him. He doesn't have to read the polls to know what Americans want and need. If he ran America like a good concert, we'd all be happy, working and we'd be better dancers.
***
How many reasons could you add? Worthy suggestions will be posted below.
May God bless President Obama. And Stevie Wonder.
I wish Obama well. I only wish I could bid him "Farewell!"
:~)
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